(click killua)

nel garf hater

hi i'm nel

(16 autistic nonbinary aro lesbian white jew)available on accounts garfhater2000 garfhater2001 garfhater2002 and garfhater2003 (all except 2003 were suspended then restored, most commonly for saying the rent a girlfriend female cast should break out of the screen and kill all men)i am a high school student at vermont high school. my teachers think i am funny because they do not know i am always incredibly serious about everything. my mother does not proclaim herself to be a "fandom elder" because does not consider herself to be old. she used to write gay smallville fanfiction. she bought me ouran high school host club thinking it was yaoi when i was 9. i (age 9) was forced to correct her on this matter. at age 11 she recommended me hetalia. my favorite song is non nobis domine sab version by rosephanye powell. i eat cream cheese out of the bin. i told this to my school's band director and he complimented my "dry sense of humor". i dropped out of elementary school after a student replaced my water with a fatal poison. i made the clemont character aihunter x hunter is a fucked up pokemon season, but it is actually based on the yaoi mpreg manga "patalliro". yoshihiro togashi listed this as "character design influence for yu yu hakusho" and reading the wikipedia page its lead love interest is just killua. i mean, an ex assassin from a famous assassin family who fell for his target and reformed through the relationship (he also almost gives birth to two children but that is irrelevant). do you know who else this description matches (except for the last part)? killua. his personality however is different from killua so we do not know for sure if there was much influence there. however, what we do know for sure is that yoshihiro togashi reads yaoi mpregforest of piano is adapted from the 2001 anime hikaru no go, but it is a very bad adaptation since the mentor figure is not dead. also, the rival character has stupid glasses. the one from hikaru no go has a fuckass bob but we will not address that. hi score girl is a better adaptation, as it does not have a mentor figure at all, or any subplots involving the mafia. i did not like the mafia subplot in forest of piano. despite the lack of a mentor figure, you can still tell it is a hikaru no go adaptation because the ghost of a video game character who sometimes advises the protagonist and inevitably disappears from this world once he comes into his own (also the rich girl video game prodigy rival of protagonist love interest being named akira) is a parallel too specific to ignore. you know what else is a hikaru no go adaptation? ratatouille (direct parallels to sai's backstory with chef gusteau, remy has a similar relationship to linguini as sai does to hikaru, i guess colette is akira). but we're not ready for that conversationthe anime series the disastrous life of saiki k is actually shuichi asou's adaptation of the jim davis comic strip "garfield the cat". in both cases, a recognizable protagonist with an iconic favorite food who exclusively communicates telepathically navigates his daily life and attempts to get to that food despite the antics of his pathetic comic artist caretaker, his caretaker's hot wife, his best friend whose mind he cannot read, at least one girl in love with him, and many more. the main difference is that saiki kusuo is a metaphor for autism, whereas garfield is not. but is it? is garfield overwhelmed with the general expectations of society, trapped in self hatred he projects upon his friendships, shunning them for rejecting the concept of a "normal" life in favor of embracing themselves for who they are, while secretly envying their freedom? is the moral of the story that of self love? is garfield an unreliable narrator in his "annoyance" with his peers, human or animal? only jim davis knows

(click killua)

I DO NOT "KIN" KILLUA ZOLDYCK

(you do not have to click this killua)

it is stupid to think this. i do not even like herif i were to taint my good reputation at vermont high school for the sake of a "kinlist", killua zoldyck from hunter x hunter would certainly not be included. my account is framed around her but this is solely because she is fun to bully. i need an outlet for my problems. if you are to equate me with or merely imply i might relate to this girl i will take it as an insult. she is addicted to gambling. i am not. she tried to off herself when she found out her one friend made another friend. i did not. her communication with her one friend was so bad that they could not even commit a lovers' suicide. mine was not. she does not have a stable emotional well being, home life or singular friendship. i do. i have everything that killua zoldyck does not, and none of what she has. we are both alive? not until i get my hands on her we aren't. there's only room for one of us, it's me or killua zoldyck from hunter x hunter. and the one left is going to be meshe thinks it is a flex that she only has one close friendship, and it means she can be more intimate with this friend, a sign of true love. she is wrong. she is merely sad, lonely, and incredibly emotionally dependent on someone who friendzoned herthroughout the series, killua equates gon to "light". what is "light"? good or bad? if you come too close to a fire, it will burn you. and yet, like moths to a flame, if there is a light in the darkness we are drawn to this light. if we stare too long it blinds us, unable to see the world, to tell fact from fiction. this is what killua demonstrates in her speech, "gon, you are light", stating that gon's brightness hurts her eyes and yet she stares, feeling guilt and shame when she looks away. so she lets herself be blinded, forgetting the reality of the situation, letting gon drag her to hell. she does not understand her own tragic lesbian poetry. i know her mental state better than she does. this is stupid. this would never happen to methere is a point in the chimera ant arc where killua almost dies. in her last breaths, she regrets her failure to protect gon. however, she is dying because she was impaled by multiple swordfish. this is a great tragedy because gon, the girl she died protecting, is heavily associated with fish. her original weapon was a fishing rod, and she came from an island called WHALE island (fish) where she, in her free time, would fish. killua was killed by what she died protecting. again, this would not happen to mealso, i consider killua and gon to be female and in a yuri relationship and i have relatively strong evidence for such. believe me when i say i have read actual yuri. i have read the classics, non-classics, magical girl yuribait, things i do not feel comfortable listing on this carrd... i have read it all. i am not a "fake himejoshi", i know shit. killua and gon are, despite canonically being male, one of the only true depictions i have seen of middle school tragic unrequited lesbian romance. despite hunter x hunter generally being considered yaoibait between other characters and having apparently been inspired by patalliro, killugon is yuribait. they were a direct inspiration for bloom into you. bloom into you ripped their dialogue and edited the names. look it up. i am experienced enough to find yuri where yoshihiro togashi does not want me to

(now you can click killua)

do not interact criteria

this is stupid because i do not actually have a dni. i do not care who follows me. however, though you can follow and i may even follow back, my account will likely be unsafe for the following people:- anti fujoshis
- anti fujoshis who make yaoi jokes
- vermont high school students (you are trying so hard to be me)
- this is not true for the one who follows me. i love you
- don't like trans hcs
- don't think true female romance involves murder
- don't think satoko and rika are absolute relationship goals
- think paul mccartney wasn't beheaded in a 1966 traffic accident and replaced by a lookalike. do you really believe that? do you really believe what apple records has to say? "dna cloning wasn't invented until 1973 and still does not work on humans" apple records is lying to you. who are you to know about their secret scientist branch studying dna replication in hopes of replacing any given musician? unless you died long ago and were replicated by apple records and are trying to hide their organization. this is not to say everyone who disagrees with me is a clone made by apple records but i wouldn't be surprised if everyone who disagrees with me is a clone made by apple records. "apple records wan't founded until 1968" we just don't know
- killua zoldyck
unfortunately, killua and gon have a similar dynamic to serena and ash from pokemon xy, both killua and serena originally having been confined by their families to a specific goal which they then abandon for a relationship that leaves them equally confined, their "goal" entirely centered around emulating another person whose flaws they slowly forget, overcorrecting their own. except, considering her nature as a child prodigy at her family’s art (while serena was kinda just at mid rhyhorn racing), little sister she attempts to rescue, and lack of goal and inferiority complex thereof rather than successful discovery of an alternative talent, killua is actually arguably more similar to clemont than serena. either way those who knew me as nelskittyyy on anipoketwt where i was the 2022 equivalent of what today would be a pjsk fan know this is very badif i say i want killua and gon to die, i am 100% serious. especially if there are heart emojis. i mean to imply they are destined for a tragic end, in which they inevitably succumb to their individual flaws as well as those of their relationship. if there are heart emojis, i am simply implying that this concept incites great feelings of positivity and loveDO NOT ASK ME TO UNFOLLOW SOMEONE /SRS. i understand that you are concerned for my well being but that is my own business. but do understand that just because i did not unfollow a mutual who did something does not mean i "agree" with what they did, and more likely that i am blissfully unaware (AND WOULD LIKE TO STAY THAT WAY). this does not apply for my own actions, and i recognize my imperfection. if i accidentally say something in some way harmful, i would like to know what it is so i can avoid future mistakesused to have porn bots on here but they never seemed to respect my boundaries. it was almost like they couldn't read

(last killua, click to go home)

codependency huh?

looks at girl heteroly

(major spoilers for hunter x hunter)okay so. brief warning: this is not information on me. this is an intensive analysis of killua's relationship to gon as a representation of toxic codependency, how their relationship has served them in the narrative, and the possible outcomes considering what we have so far. if you want to go back to information on me, click the image of killua staring at gon at the gym with one of the most down bad expressions i've ever seen while gon smiles and clutches her stupid beetle phone in preparation for a date that is not with killua, thus why killua is relatively intent in her stare in this image. afterwards, when asked if she's ever been on a date before (she hasn't lmao lonely ass), she mourns how she was unable to because after escaping her evil assassin family she was "with gon all the time" and "hopes it will stay that way". tl;dr most straight killua momentokay so. gon and killua's relationship looks healthy. it's a normal yuri coded friendship, where girl 1 is a free spirited optimist and girl 2 just sulks all the time. together, they fight monsters and mutant clowns and the mafia with the help of androgynous blonde dude and sunglasses in the expected path of a "hunter"but though it's often considered heartwarming, and one of the most closely bonded friendships in anime, is it good to be so closely bonded? the narrative, described without the general positive framing of the series (which entirely dissappears in the chimera ant arc, leading most who criticize their relationship to only do so for that portion), describes emotional dependency, idolization built from a savior complex, lack of communication due to fear of abandonment, and even, at one point, (consensual!) physical harm. it nearly culminates in a double suicide, and even that is romantic, a happy ending, to die together. at least we have each other, no matter what it means to do sokillua and gon are, at heart, a clear representation of the clinical definition of a codependent relationship

(image links to source)

yeah, you can see how we got here. and not many people deny that they're codependent. gon needs killua to protect her, and killua, having been neglected her whole life and trying to feel some self worth, needs to be needed. gon runs ahead while killua cleans up behind her, never once complaining about being the bystander, but constantly questioning her ability to fit even that position: endlessly dedicated, doing everything, everything for gon